Teen Troubles

Lately, it's been quite a roller coaster around my house. It isn't something that can be blamed on my babies, either.

Back around his birthday, my eldest starting having super adverse reactions to his ADHD medication.

It started with the misplacement of his Nintendo DS, or at least that is the event that really showed that something was amiss.

My child has every piece to every toy that he has ever had, literally. They may not be kept in the exact same location as one another, but a piece can matched with its mate fairly quickly.

He NEVER loses anything, 'til now. To add insult to injury, he doesn't really know if he lost his DS or if he took it to school and it got stolen.

He honest to God cannot remember. It was so bad, that one day he came into the dining room and confessed having broken the house rule of having taken the DS to school and that he has faced the consequence by losing it and was asking for his house punishment.

The next day, I found him rummaging through his bedroom and the garage frantically searching for the missing DS because in reality, he had no earthly idea what became of it.

When I sat him down and talked to him, I discovered that he had been falling asleep on the school bus every afternoon on the way home from school.

This behaviour had been going on for weeks, and he had assumed that it was normal and was living with it.

I felt awful. Over the next week, I noticed that not only was he sleeping on the way home from school, but that he just could not stay awake in the evenings at home, either.

Then, one weekend, it happened. I experienced "Zombie child" behaviour first hand. I had always heard about the adverse affects of ADHD medication, but I had never in my life expected something so awful.

My child came home from school, and just vegetated. He lay on my couch and stared at the wall for literally hours on end.

The television was on, but he couldn't watch it. His siblings tried to get his attention, sometimes even climbing up on top of him, but he didn't seem to notice.

After the babies went to sleep, I tried snapping him out of it, but NOTHING worked. I even tried to get him to run to Wal-mart with me at 9 p.m. at night (usually something he would have found funny and jumped at the opportunity of going) but he would not budge.

The entire weekend went that way. Monday, I put a call into his Doctor's office about him having adverse reactions to his medication.

The only call back that I received was to schedule a re-evaluation of his situation by the clinic where he sees that doctor, which was to be the following Friday.

I had thought that they might help us or that we might find out something from his doctor by then.

We went in for the evaluation, were told that our case was a priority because of the bad side-effects that he was experiencing, and that the doctor would be calling us shortly.

I finally had to make the decision to take him off of the medication myself so that he could function enough to stay awake at school.

The doctor NEVER did call me back. The only correspondence that we received from the office was a letter referring us back to our pediatrician saying that because my child was not aggressive, violent, or mentally unstable that they could not help us.

So, here we are, without any sort of medication, flying solo in a world of distraction. My child did poorly this past 9 weeks on his grades because the brunt of it was spent on that high dosage of medication that was having the opposite of the desired effect and scary side effects to boot.

Now, we are working together to try and find ways that he can teach himself to focus without the medication in some attempt to get his grades up.

When we had the re-evaluation with the clinical manager at that doctor's office, we were informed that our diagnosis may be off, but that he just could not tell us anything because he wasn't licensed to do so.

I do not have any idea where to start anymore. The teachers were the ones who decided that he had ADHD and all of the questionnaires sent to them by the doctor were filled out to that affect.

His symptoms off of the medication are mainly concentration and focusing. He isn't really hyper and never has been unless he was taking that last medication.

We had an incident over the weekend that I do not know whether to blame him for, or chalk it up to lack of concentration and being able to focus.

Last night, I found myself having to ride him about a project that should have been being worked on for the past WEEK.

He had to re-research everything because the original work printed only half of what was on the page (the left half) and it took most of the evening.

Getting him to write a copy that was spelled correctly and not scratched out on was also difficult.

It took us until 11p.m. to get it finished and even then it was not as good as it should have been.

So I am torn. I do not want him to be put on another round of medication that will make things worse, yet I do not know where to start in asking for help.

I only have focus and concentration problems to go off of, and the idea that a clinical manager thinks that he does not have ADHD.

What is a Mum to do?

Love The Doctor, Hate The Staff!

I love our Doctor, but I just cannot stand the office staff at the location where we see him. So far, my son's new ADHD doctor's office has managed to get us started into their program pretty quickly (or so I had thought at first.)

But the office staff has managed to actually "Lose" two of our appointments and has detrimentally rescheduled a key appointment that my son really truly needed to keep at the time, delaying our official entry into the program itself.

I really do not know what to think about the whole thing. I have tried to keep a positive attitude about everything for my son's sake, but he has even noticed the many problems that they are having about getting him scheduled and actually seen by his doctor.

Today, we had an appointment scheduled for 3:15. I had to argue with the receptionist at the end of our last appointment because she keeps wanting to schedule us at about lunch-time during a school day every time.

She does offer to write us excuses saying that it will make everything alright, which I do appreciate the offer.

Each time she does this, I nicely try and explain to her that my son attends a school that places an emphasis on attendance as part of the criteria for continuation in their program. I know that we will be seeing the doctor at least once a month which will count as an absense each time, which will amount to too many absenses to stay in that school.

Each time I have the feeling that I am "Pulling teeth" just to get an after-school appointment at a time that I know that I can actually get us there, punctually.

I should have become suspicious when I didn't receive a reminder call from the office reminding me of the appointment today. I usually get these calls on the business day prior to the actual appointment.

That reminder call never came. I just shrugged it off and planned to make our appointment as our little business card reminder stated.

My son even made a point to write his reminder on his arm where he couldn't help but read it as he grabbed his books at the end of his school day.

My husband surprised me today and came home early from work so that he could watch our babies while I took Bregon to his appointment (a rare but special treat.)

I picked him up at school with very little fan-fare and we headed over the office. Traffic even went in our favor for once and we arrived about five minutes early for the appointment.

Things were going really well, or so I had thought. I had my copies of progress reports and standardized test scores that would give the doctor an idea of how Bregon js doing in school. I even had my little notebook with a page devoted to notes about his progress on the new medication.

When we checked in with the receptionist, the counselor was very happy to see us and immediately struck up a conversation with us. The receptionist, however, appeared very surprised to see us.

She disappeared into the backroom (seemingly to pull our file) while the counselor and I discussed the lack of availability of diet grape soda in grocery stores today, newspaper routes as good jobs for youths today, and the ironies of philanthropic Americans who gladly fund the rebuilding of bridges destroyed as acts of war in other countries yet will not pay to maintain our rather delapidated bridges here at home.

When she came back she seemed even more confused. At first, I had thought that she might just be confused over the topics of conversation that she had walked in on, but I was soon to find that was NOT the case.

She outright asked me why we were here. I showed her our appointment card for her inspection while she asked us who made the appointment for today and why.

As it turns out, the handwriting on the card was HERS. She then told us that we shouldn't be seeing the doctor yet because there is a PROCESS.

I told her as nicely as I could muster that we had been coming here since early July and I had thought that we were going THROUGH and complying with some sort of process.

The counselor had to intervene and begin translating for me because the receptionist seemed very VERY confused. She finally said that she had called someone and that they had verified that we were not "In-service" whatever that meant.

I asked her nicely to explain to me what that meant and please let me know what we needed to do to get classified as "In-service."

This really confused her even more. She told me that we appeared to already have done everything as she had just glanced down at our file and were just waiting for classification which could take months. Until then, we were not "Authorized" to see the doctor.

She then asked me who had told me to come in for this appointment. I tried to suppress a case of the giggles that kept trying to slip out because at this point, the counselor was still trying to simplify whatever I was telling her so that she could understand everything. (As it turned out, it was HER handwriting on that card!)

Keep in mind, we do NOT have a language barrier here, either! I tried to keep my poker face on as best as I could, telling her that the Doctor had told us to come back in 4 weeks so that he could monitor my son's NEW medication.

Her eyes got HUGE over this as she told me that we shouldn't have even seen that doctor yet (something that I had thought we had already covered under the "Process" heading!)

Apparently, classification doesn't really matter if the DOCTOR says that he wants to see you. She managed to get us in on the list for the day, though she remained confused.

I was so very glad that I didn't have the babies with us. They would have really made it a three-ringed circus in there! Thank goodness for sweet and caring and thoughtful husband!

Almost immediately, the Doctor called us back to his office as he had the receptionist take Bregon's height and weight. Poor Bregon had been taking the whole conversation in, as it turns out.

Once in our doctor's office, we started discussing Bregon things like grades, progress reports, and the effects of the new medication and its dosage. The doctor went over the print-outs that I had made for him and asked Bregon some questions.

Bregon was very sceptical at this point after what had happened in the office waiting room with the receptionist and yet another lost appointment and he answered the doctor's questions very half-heartedly.

I think the doctor must have understood and had seen some of what had gone on because he was very helpful and tolerant of him in spite of his lack of enthusiasm.

All in all, the actual appointment went well (or anti-appointment!) We were advised to come back in month to re-assess everything and Bregon's progress. I groaned because I would have to talk to the receptionist AGAIN.

This time, the counselor was NOT there to translate as he was with a patient. I let her know that we needed to come back in a month in an after school appointment, please!

She nodded and turned around from the computer to hand me an appointment card. The date really doesn't matter, but the time she put down was for 1p.m. in the afternoon. She smiled and offered to write us an excuse for it.

I apologized, and asked for something after 3p.m. AGAIN, and remembered to say "Please!" I was really feeling the need for my translator...the giggles had gone away for good this time, too~.

She very reluctantly moved the appointment to 3:30 after I making me go through the whole school-attendance-being-very-important-for-my-son-getting-to-STAY-at-that-particular-school spiel.

We left with an increase in dosage for the new medication and our appointment slated for AFTER school. I also left with a huge sense of dread that the appointment will again be "Lost" and struck from the books for whatever reason AGAIN.

Don't get me wrong, Bregon and I adore this Doctor and the Counselor is really cute, too. I just cannot develop any affection for the office staff.

I had thought that we had something going there after our last appointment, but I was so very wrong about that!

It was really funny to watch the look on the receptionist's face when the Counselor told me how the state hires the staff for this particular office and how they didn't have any say over any of it (implying competency issues.)

My biggest worry, though, is that this time, my son really noticed and felt the whole "Lost appointment" issue. It was reflected in his rapore with the Doctor and his session.

The only thing that helps remind Bregon that the Doctor is an okay kind of guy is the fact that he is a classmate's father and volunteers at the school festivals with me. It really did help a little that he told him that he would see him on Friday at the 7th grade festival.

As a Mum, I am torn on this issue. What do you do when you love the Doctor, hate the staff?

A Back-To-School Outing With Triplets in Tow

For some reason or another, I thought it would be a good idea to take my eldest and have his eyes checked (at the recommendation of his pediatrician) and have his hair cut today. These seem like normal, everyday and easy tasks, but for us, nothing is ever easy!

I remembered to call yesterday and set up his eye appointment which went swimmingly well. I did forget to ask where the office was located, not realizing that there were more than one optical places in the mall down the street. Ah well, it could have been worse. At least I knew the name of the doctor the appointment was with-that was a start (I know it sounds a bit odd, but the referral was made by phone and no further information was given other than the name and phone number!)

I started about four hours early planning this morning exactly how things should happen for the day. I even was able to get the triplets down for the nap at the right time (lately it's been touch & go because of the teething.)

Bregon got up at a decent hour (no small feat for a tween-ager who is in the midst of his last week before school starting) and he even got dressed without any prodding. He even chose what appeared to be clean clothes to wear (sometimes an issue when dealing with a tween who just hasn't adjusted to the teen-aged world of deodorant and smelly-good products!)

I managed to get all of my make-up on and my hair fixed to where I could at least live with it once the triplets decided to run tiny sticky fingers through it (as of late its a trend!) I even had their lunch ready to go as they were waking up. I remembered to put their laundry into the dryer and even had three tiny clean outfits ready for when they woke up from their nap!

Of course once the babies began to stir, our phone started ringing. I very stupidly answered it. I have know idea what I was thinking at the time. It was about twelve by this point! Only two hours to get everyone diapered, dressed, fed and the car loaded! Eventually I was able to get the kids dressed and into their chairs with a little help from big brother.

While the babies had lunch, Bregon and I took turns fending off the cats and the dog who thought that it might be their lucky day for tasty treats (the babies have a habit of trying to share meals) while I made our usual bottle of apple juice mixed with water (its a 36 oz plastic apple juice container that I take EVERYWHERE with us.) I packed the blue insulated bag with sippy cups and juice, grabbed the teddy grahams, and headed for the car, stroller in tow.

I am not sure how, but we managed to actually get out of the house in our entirety, without the dog trying to tag along, and all three kitty cats still INSIDE the house before ten till one. As I pulled out of the driveway to head for the mall which is all of three minutes away or less, my cell phone rang.

I feel really bad having to cut that conversation short. I really appreciate the help of the person to whom I was speaking to, but I am just not that co-ordinated enough to be able to successfully unload the babies from their car seats into that stroller with only one hand free! However, I did manage to unload and set up the stroller and pack the stroller bag one handed- that wasn't too shabby if I do say so myself!

Once we actually got into the mall, I discovered that the location of the eye doctor was NOT where I had thought it was. As luck would have it, I chose the wrong entrance and ended up at the competitor's office on the opposite end of the mall. Lucky for us, we were early enough to still make it in time for our appointment.

We actually did find the right place and in time too. The problem was, the very tiny waiting area was very full with only one chair free. I don't mind standing, but because all of the seats were basically filled, I wasn't able to fit the stroller into the actual office and was forced to leave it in half in the doorway with over half of it sticking out into the mall in the way of the mall walker zone.

The people waiting were NOT every sympathetic to our plight at all. In fact, we were drawing quite a few stares. I grabbed the sign-in sheet, tried to quickly fill it out (and still do it the right way) and managed to confirm with the receptionist lady that we were there for our appointment, but that we may have to wait outside in the mall on the bench by the doorway because we could not fit inside the waiting area.

Everyone just kept staring at us. I tried to say excuse me, and ask if they would mind at least standing up for a second so that I could get my limo-sized stroller into the actual office and park it in the walk-way into the actual optical store. They just all continued to stare at us as if I was speaking some foreign language.

I finally gave up trying to go in through the actual entrance to the waiting area, and opted to back the stroller out of the doorway, and into the actual store. The people shopping in the actual store were all very nice and stepped out of the way so that I could maneuver past them without mowing anybody down (did I mention that I cannot drive that thing very well?)

Maybe the difference between the staring people who were sitting and the nice ones who were standing is that the sitting ones felt safe in their chairs and the standing ones were afraid of being mowed down by the crazy lady with the triplets! Who knows.

Of course my luck ran out about the time I was able to get the stroller parked and semi out of the way of the basic doctor office flow of traffic. Kian had apparently grown quite bored with his stroller toy and his juice and had taken to trying to grab as much as Kai's hair as he could manage (Kai's barely has any hair).

Kai was busy trying not to screech in pain while trying to get my attention. Vivie was a good baby girl and just sat and had her juice and stared back at all the people who had been so busily staring at her from their seats. Bregon alternated between fetching flying sippy cups and picking up tossed toys and teddy grahams off of the floor while nervously awaiting his name to be called.

Kian was so awful about hair pulling, I ended up having to switch he and Kai so that Kai would have a clear shot at Kian's nice rather shaggy blond hair (he actually managed to eschew pulling it somehow even though nobody would have blamed him much if he had tried!) Kian of course howled over the punishment and NOTHING made him feel any better.

Bregon meanwhile had been called back to have his eyes numbed and dilated. That poor patient lady would get to where she was almost able to get those drops into his eyes and he would pull away and say, "Nope! I'm just not ready yet!" It took her a bit to get those drops in too, poor dear.

As luck would have it, Bregon is just a tad bit near-sighted. Basically it was my choice over whether or not to go ahead and get the glasses or not. Last time, we bypassed them and I just felt we should give them a go and see if it helps him out in school. Time will tell!

In the meantime, we had to pick out frames. Yes, Kian still howled and everyone else was busy lobbing sippy cups and dragon-fly toys and dinosaur toys everywhere in some attempt to make new friends by enticing innocent passer's by to pick up the items and play the "Guess which baby this object belongs to game!"

Meanwhile, Bregon set out to try on every rather large set of frames he could find. Thankfully, this very nice English-sounding lady took pity on our plight and ran over to help him make a decision (did I mention we are not very good with decision making-it's an ADHD thing.) But, tomorrow we should have glasses!!!!!

Next, I got the bright idea that we should cut his hair. It has gotten very long. In fact, it is so long, that he looks like someone from the '70's. Lucky for us, he was in a quick decision making mode and was able to convey to the stylist exactly what he wanted and in under three minutes. He wanted to look like the new Dr. Who. Of course the poor lady hadn't a clue who or what that was!

The hair book thankfully had a picture that would suffice for her to be able to cut all of his hair off and he now is sporting an actual haircut, not just a trim grown out over months and months of cultivation!

Kian screamed most of the way through the haircut too, in spite of a very nice lady talking to him and trying to make him feel better. The only remedy for Kian seemed to be us leaving the mall entirely.

Once we got home, the babies all were very happy to be finally in their play-yard. They immediately set about tossing as many of the toys as they could outside of it. Over all, the day went rather well. We were on time to our appointment in spite of the odds and were even able to fit in an extra task as well!