Happy Birthday Baby Boy

Posted by Vulnadia on Jul 22, 2009 at 02:04 PM Yesterday was my nephew's 4th birthday and of course I was there with bells on. In fact, I had been planning and plotting for his birthday for almost a month...finding the right present often takes time, especially when you have helpers! I always start a month early because I remember how he was almost born at midsummer and how my sister called me for once to kill the time while they filled her prescription for the meds to stop her contractions. I don't think I shall ever forget that, actually. You see, I seem to be the only one planning for his birth. Sister had some serious problems, but I couldn't prove it and nobody believed me, choosing the easier route of denial which is what many choose to do. I looked up at one point and realized that she would be having the baby soon and had no bed, no bottles and no plan of obtaining any of this. I called Daddy and arranged it so I could take her out and get the bare essentials so to say so that baby at least would have a place to sleep and a way to eat when he got here. Luckily, she was living next door to me at the time so I could keep a close eye on my nieces and soon to be nephew. My sister's problems became blatantly noticable when my nephew was less than 2 weeks old. It was impossible for her to hide them after my husband came home to find both nieces in tears in our front yard, sweaty from the 100+degree weather and one having wet herself from not being able to get inside either house to go potty. We couldn't tell if the baby was okay or not and my sister and her husband were unresponsive in the front seats of their car. The girls had climbed over to get out and nobody had noticed or even knew how long they had been out there like that. That was the day that the kids went to live with my Daddy for the first time. They flip-flopped for about 2 months off and one before the living arrangments became consistent and final. In spite of everything, everyone was okay somehow. Fast forward to today and sister is supposedly clean for 2 years now. The kids still are with my Daddy. In fact, he is the only parent my nephew has ever really known. My sister is a part of their life, but an inconsistent one. It's something I have never understood, really. For a time she would be there as much as humanly possible, but lately visits are coming more and more infrequent. She missed her youngest daughter's birthday entirely, but supposedly made it up to her on a weekend a few weeks later. A 6 year old doesnt understand that at all. We didn't hear from her yesterday, either. She said she had to work and got off at 6. We were over there as soon as the kids got home from camp at 5 and stayed nearly til 7 which is late even for us. How can any Mother miss her own child's birthday? We had to remind her that it was this Tuesday, too. She says she will do something for him this weekend and that he understood. I don't understand, so how can a 4yr old even try to begin to fathom this? All we could do was make sure that he had a happy birthday with all his cousins present to tell him how much we love him. Even his favorite Uncle "Nonnie" came by to give him birthday hugs and trucks. I went home and cried though, because it still seems like his Mommie doesn't understand anything at all.