The Woes Of Having A Teen

Posted by Vulnadia on Mar 20, 2009 at 02:37 PM This week, I have really gotten my wake-up call about living with a teen. I mean, it seems like yesterday he was playing with his X-men and Spiderman figures and trying to master his skateboard! This week, I have been given a glimpse of what is to come in the next few years. I had my eldest's best friend over to spend the night Saturday night and got them tickets to my theater's dinner theater performanceat The Robinson Film Center. They sat at the table with my inlaws and some of our oldest patrons. It was a real test for them, let me tell you. I just knew that my son was going to be embarressed by my character work because I was cast as "Blanche" basically of "Streetcar Named Desire" fame and her background is very um, shady to say the least. Not to mention that his favorite cartooning teacher was cast opposite me as "Stanley" and we had to share some interesting moments on stage. But, apparently my son is growing up because both he and his friend were pleased with our performances and proud of them even. Wow! After I struck the set for the night and cleaned up, we went home and played Wii with them until the wee hours of the morning. We had a blast. Then on Monday, I was shocked to find out that the child that had spent the night with us had taken off from his parents house that morning. He isn't a bad kid, and he really didn't run away. There was an arguement over a huge project (I can't say that the same basic story hadn't already taken place at my house over same said project because it had) had ensued, and the boy had gotten royally upset, and went to blow off some steam. But he left for his steam-blowing walk in the morning, before school. When his Dad went after him, they had another confrontation, and he ran from him and they couldn't find him after that. His Mom figured that he would come home, but 30 minutes went by and he didn't. She called our house later that afternoon hoping he would call us or try to call Bregon after school. All I could think of was that it sounded like what had happened to my sister at that age. I seriously had flashbacks and hoped that this wouldn't end the same way. It's the choices we make in these situations that really do shape the future of our children, really they do. No choice is a small one at this point, and one wrong move can set a child on the wrong track. But thankfully, by the time I had collected my eldest from school and he had checked in with his friends mom to offer advice on where to look, we found out that his friend had come home. As it turns out he had gone to a friends house and fallen asleep under a tree in their backyard and when he woke up, he just went home. We were all so very happy and thankful that he was safe and sound. I talked to his Mom today, and we discussed how with all the little siblings, it's hard for our boys to have their own space and a place to go when they are upset or need to blow off steam. We both are terrified because we are the proud Moms of teens. We don't know exactly what to do, or how we are going to handle them just yet, but we do know this. We are the Mommies and we have each other to rely on and compare notes and form a gameplan. We know our kids aren't bad kids and that we need to find a happy medium on keeping them in line and still maintain that good relationship that is so necessary in today's scary world. Seriously, though, Moms of teens, what do you do in this situation? How would you handle it? I talked it over with my child. I told him that it was okay to be a friend, and to look out for one another. We talked about ways to blow off steam, have alone time and all, even in big familys like ours. But oh my goodness, they are just now turning 14 basically. We have years of this ahead of us!